Wednesday, February 17, 2010

I surrender...

I give up the fight
Let there be an end,
A privacy
An obscure nook for me,
I want to be forgotten
Even by God!

- R Downing.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Half empty or Half full?

Source for the philosophy this time:
a SMS received on Tuesday, 24 March 2009, 19.50 hours!

Source reads as follows: We are camping in the forest. To pass time we start narrating real life incidents. My turn is up, you are next – narrate the nicest incident in your life!

??? … ???

I dodge the question by saying, “You go first!” and then sit down to think… several minutes later I realise that if I was asked to narrate one of the most painful or terrible memories, I would have easily come up with a dozen! But ask for a nice incident and I’m black… I mean, blank! Does that make me a tragedy queen? Someone with no good thing in life to talk about? Hardly! It makes me one of those who always insist perhaps to look at the glass as half-empty. Oh my god… it makes me a whiner, a pessimist! No, i refuse to believe that - come on now, think! One good sweet incident that isn’t a good result, birthday or a wedding!

Several more minutes pass, and I notice something. Hey… the guy didn’t answer back! Does that mean he couldn’t think of anything either? Of course it was a forwarded, right? So it means he must have received it from someone else and just forwarded it on, because he couldn’t reply himself! Hmmm… is this theory correct? Are we all like this? I decide to test it for more blog fodder… I forward the same SMS, wording it differently to make it personal and send it to 10 different people.

24 hours later, I’m sitting in front of the laptop screen typing away that I’ve not been disappointed… not a single reply back… and mind you it was some of the closest people I know who would never ordinarily ignore a SMS from me!
A few days back, when it rained unexpectedly, the sun and the clouds met and they shot up a beautiful rainbow in sky. I was in market and I cried out loud when I spotted it. People around me followed my line of gaze and once they saw what was causing all the excitement, they gave me a look that plainly said – why are u behaving like a 10 year old?

Gosh human tendency! We make the terrible times larger than life, but we forget in our worldly mess the pure joy of small (read ‘petty’ in common terminology) moments! And ask for a happy memory and we perhaps come up with, “hmmm… when I topped the class some 7 years back!” Oh, quite an achievement I’m sure, but come on people – is that the best you can do? I’m talking about the small things in life that nevertheless make it worth living. Perhaps a lovely weekend somewhere secluded, meeting some stranger who made a journey worthwhile or a Valentine date with a friend laughing at the mushy couples surrounding you? Yeah, those were some of the sweetest moments and I have to remember to remember them. It’s the phrase – smelling the proverbial roses!

Conclusion: I believe – Look at the glass as half-empty and it doesn’t take time for it to dry up completely; but look at it as half-full and the glass really does start getting full.

P.S. - This is an old post, that I recently found buried in some corner of my computer, so its finally seeing the light of the day after almost year. :)

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Finding Me

Sometimes I think, if I had taken a class in philosophy, I probably would have scored top marks in it! For me, life's every mood, every turn of events, every decision to make... marks a quest, a pursuit to decipher a deeper, hidden meaning – constantly trying to see myself in a different light that would make more sense. Maybe sometimes I overdo it, but then again as common philosophy would suggest, isn’t that how we find ourselves? Isn’t that the whole point, the way to do better, by knowing what we are made up of, at last for starters? But me, I still get confused, like now, while typing this, a constant dilemma… because ‘Finding Me’ is a test which is not so easy to crack after all.

Sometimes Life’s just so serious
And there are days when naughty is the way to be,
But now I’m curious and confused;
Which of it is really me?

P.S. – If all the above gibberish did not make sense to you, don’t worry – it just proves that you are a very sane person! :)